The Art of Camping

In my family, there is a right way and a wrong way to do pretty much everything. And when I say "pretty much everything," I would point to the fact that in the not too distant past, I was told I cut my toast wrong. I have tried to throw off many of these stifling expectations...because, really, I don't think it really matters if I fill up the left side of the sink or the right side of the sink to wash my dishes.

But there is at least one area in which I hold on to the rules with all my might: Camping. There really are rules for camping. And, because I happened to be camping next to a number of people this past weekend who seem not to have been taught these rules, I'd like to share a few.

First, a definition. I know this one is hotly debated, and you are free to disagree. But, really, camping involves a tent (or perhaps no form of shelter). Sleeping in an RV or a trailer just isn't camping. You are welcome to sleep in such vehicles, but don't pretend that you are camping.

Now, onto the rules...

1. Respect others who are camping nearby. So, if you are in a campground, realize that there are other people also camping near you. They probably don't want to hear your favorite music all day. Actually, if they are true campers, they don't want to hear your music at all. And, really, why did you even bring your stereo to begin with? If you just want to sit in a lawn chair, listen to the radio, and drink beer...stay in your own backyard. If you can't stand to be without noise for a whole day, then maybe you're not quite ready for camping. And, really, fireworks at midnight? People are trying to sleep...or at least enjoy their own campfire. Oh, and I, personally, don't want to hear you belch as loud as you can as you're walking by my campsite.

2. If you need to drink alcohol, that's fine...just don't get drunk. Again, if you need to get wasted while you're camping, you probably just aren't ready to camp. Stay home and drink your heart out.

3. Leave your campsite cleaner than when you arrived. This includes picking up your beer bottle lids and taking that bag of dirty diapers down out of the tree.

4. Enjoy being outside. Enjoy the fire. Enjoy the food. Read good books. Have good conversations. Take a hike. Be willing to jump in the cold lake. Be helpful and friendly to those you pass in the camp ground.

There are, I'm sure, other rules--like what to use or not use when starting a fire, putting out a fire before you go to bed, and things along the lines of how to not get hypothermia or poison ivy, and how to respond to wild life--but let's just start with these 4 easy rules.